Words of Wisdom: Business Leadership

True Business Leaders take something of low productivity and turn it into something of high productivity

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Words of Wisdom: Performance

Performance comes first and foremost from productivity, and without a greater sense of purpose there will be little productivity. Purpose is Leadership driven

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Words of Wisdom: Maximise Productivity

To maximise productivity and performance it is critical that your employees are so invested in the company, that they feel and act like owners

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Negotiating with Influence: Irrefutable Law Eight

What is the difference between Persuasion (Influence) and Manipulation? This is the question I ask at the start of each of my Influence and Persuasion Workshop –

A question which sits at the very crux of being a person who negotiates with influence.

A question worth serious consideration and contemplation for any individual who wants to have more influence over others.

The difference? Strangely enough my research and observation of countless interactions in business and life has found that it in fact has very little to do with the persuasion/influencing technique used and everything to do with the observation and perception of the person on the receiving end of your ‘persuasion’

Pause a moment and think back over the past to a time where you were on the receiving end of somebody asking something of you. A time where although you said yes, you still sat there after the fact with a sense that you had been hoodwinked/taken advantage of. There was nothing sinister about the request, it was all above board however you just knew that you had been ‘manipulated’

This is why Irrefutable Law Eight came into being.

Irrefutable Law Eight – You need to HAVE Influence

Over the past two weeks I have shared with you my first Seven Irrefutable Laws of Negotiating with Influence. Seven Laws which I know (from my own application as well as testimonials of others) when applied with focus and positive intention result in: More Yes’s; Better, stronger more committed relationships and ultimately improved outcomes for yourself and the important people in your life.

This is where I need to share a cautionary tale – As I started applying the first Seven Laws  I still wasn’t getting the results I really wanted. At first I couldn’t figure out where the problem lay until I came across a book (which I share in the tips section) and all became clear. Unfortunately I realised the fundamental problem was that because I didn’t have influence, the application of influence resulted more often than not came across as manipulation

I realise at this point (from watching audiences who I spoken to and shared this message with) that as you read this you are probably scratching your head in confusion thinking “He says I need to influence but because I don’t have influence my influence will risk coming across as manipulation?!”

Write the following down and commit yourself to understanding this

“Being Persuasive is good, but having Influence is magic!”

Whats the key difference? Lets take a look at dictionary definitions of the following words

Persuade/Influence: (verb) The act of causing a person/people to believe or do something

Influence: (Adjective) A power (especially one that operates without any direct or apparent effort) which affects a person to do something

In other words to truly be able to negotiate with influence, you need to also have influence. You will be glad to know that we all are born with influence! Not only that but we all have the ability to develop our influence (refer to Irrefutable Law’s Three and Six for guidance on how this occurs)

Lets take a look at a few tips on how to become a person of influence

  • Tip One – Read the book ‘Becoming a person of influence‘ by John Maxwell and the late Jim Dornan. This is one of my core development tools which I read and continuously work on developing every year. In it you will find the blue print on how to truly become a person of influence
  • Tip Two – Start developing your ‘expert’ influence! ‘Expert’ influence is achieved through becoming an expert in your chosen field. This includes a journey and plan of continuous development (formal and/or informal) focusing on the advancement of learning and application of knowledge and skills help me develop my Expert Influence
  • Tip Three – Become a value adder! If you look back to Irrefutable Law Three – Add value you will come across a quote which read “You are not paid for your time, but for the value you bring” To truly be a person of influence do everything in your power to add value to the relationships you seek to build. This could include but is not limited to volunteering on projects and under promising/over delivering

With the application of these and may other tips I have slowly but surely started becoming a person of influence and along with the application of the first seven laws am continuously improving as a negotiator with influence

Tomorrow Negotiating with Influence – Irrefutable Law Nine

 

 

Negotiating with Influence: Irrefutable Law Seven

Have you ever wondered why there are times when you share information/advice or offer something to somebody which is of high value to them (note – you had the permission to share it and the influence to share it) and they reject/don’t take it up/go a different way?

This has befuddled me for a long time. Especially when I have been called in by a company leader to help improve their organisations productivity and performance or help create change in the culture. I come in, do the background research and make the appropriate recommendations which experience and track record have shown will achieve the desired results and the individual does something different.

I recognise that in some instances this may very well be down to misapplication of Irrefutable Laws One – Six however not all instances and through hard experience and study I have come to understand a key cause of this frustrating symptom which brings us nicely into Irrefutable Law Seven

Irrefutable Law Seven of Negotiating with Influence – Understand the game!

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That’s right. At the end of it all, everything we do, every interaction we have is a game with different rules being played by different people each with their own intentions and motives. 

That’s why I love this quote by Sun Tzu

“He who knows when he can fight and when he cannot will be victorious”

There will be times when you can push forward and times when not. It’s not about ‘pushing forward’ but more importantly – as I outlined in yesterdays post on Irrefutable Law Six of Negotiating with Influence – about ensuring that each interaction is a ‘Win-Win’

Here are a few tips to help start applying Irrefutable Law Seven

  • Tip One –  Identify and commit to the games you will play and won’t play.

“Everyday we face decisions in our interactions with other people. We live our lives and inspire lives through the way we play the game. Some bully, some are bullied and some play tit for tat” (unknown)

Before you get involved in the game it is always worth deciding what type of player you are going to be. This helps down the line as you can be far more responsive in your interactions rather than reactive

  • Tip two – Learn to identify and utilise the different tactics and strategies game players use. A quick google search for negotiation tactics brings up the following which can help you accelerate this (look who comes up at the top of the list :0)

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  • Tip Three – (especially in a work setting) read up and learn about the Political Games People Play

There you have it – Irrefutable Law Seven – Learn to play the game.

Next up Irrefutable Law Eight of Negotiating with influence

Have a fab Wednesday and remember “Life doesn’t get better by chance, but by change”

Words of Wisdom: Performance and Productivity

High productivity and performance is not achieved through compensation. Rather, it is achieved through identifying and and understanding the individuals needs and then helping them achieve these needs

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